big hair makes me feel so confident

I have a lot of hair. I don't mean mounds and mounds of it like Cher. But if I blow dried it upside down and flung it back up (like the little mermaid, minus the red hair, fins, the sparkles from the sea and the whole shell bra thing) I would look like I stuck my hair in a socket and went back to the 80's.

I have a small head. I do. It's not like a shrunken head...all prune-y and scrunched up, but in the size range of an average head (you know, the average yet somewhat small head to the average yet somewhat large head), mine would be on the smaller size. It's not a problem. It's kind of convenient when I'm shopping in the children's department for hats, or have to look between the piano and the wall for the candle that the cat has pushed off the ledge, I bet I could even stick my head through railings on a staircase and not get stuck. Or if I did get stuck it would be really easy to get me out out. As opposed to another person with an average yet somewhat large head.

These two things being said (well, two things...plus a lot of other things I said...or typed) I tend to wear my hair up and away from my face. When I have my hair down and big my mom says it makes her feel inadequate that she produced a human with such a tiny face.

In conclusion, I would like to say that this weekend I'm getting my hair cut. Not because my mom feels bad that I have a small face, but because I want get it cut. I'm slightly afraid because I'm going to cut it short and I'm hoping it won't make my head look even smaller. Because then I don't think I would be on the average-sized head scale anymore. My head would be off the charts. Not in a good way.

In conclusion, again, I would like to tell you all to look up the song "Big Hair" by the Chenille Sisters. It's a song my family listened to when we were younger, and it's fabulous. "Who wants muscles when your hair can be your biggest part? Cause you can flex Big Hair".

Lastly, I have searched far and wide for big hair photos. See below.

There's a hole in the bucket

Yesterday was a pathetic day. You know when you have those days that even if things aren't bad you just feel pathetic? Like having a pity party? That was my day. Except something went wrong in the morning. And that spiraled me into a fit a pathetic-ness. It's my car. Poor Betty (that's her name). Let me tell you the story.

It was 10:03 am, and I had packed my huge purse with my computer and lion king lunchbox (with homemade chicken noodle soup!), put everything in my car, and went to shift into reverse. Let me stop here to tell you that I've been working out. Ok, on with the story. So I went to shift into reverse and the shifter came off. Really. It did. (that's why I told you I'd been working out, because I guess I'm so buff that I can break off the shifter). I panicked. Then I didn't. Then I panicked again. Then I calmed down. Then I tried to put it back together. I could get it to connect enough that I could get into any gear but reverse. Which was a problem. You see, I was far enough in on my driveway that I could not roll back onto the street. Being a quick thinker, I decided to make a u-turn over the grass and onto my neighbors driveway...it worked! Then I proceeded down to the place I get my car fixed. I went in and told them "My shifter is broken." They looked at me funny, sent someone out to look at my car and told me they had no idea what was going on, and that I needed to go to Ford. So, I went to Ford. I went in and said "My shifter is broken." He looked at me funny, came out to see, and told me that he'd never seen that before. Long story short (although I think it's too late for that now), they called me later in the day and told me how much it would be to fix it....I won't tell you how much, but it was over $5...way over $5. Then said they were going to rush order the parts because they were in a basement in Mississippi. Seriously. A basement in Mississippi. You know why? Because nobody ever breaks their shifter. Ok, they didn't say that last part...but they could of.

For your viewing enjoyment I've included some pictures. The first is what it usually looks like (please don't mind the empty coffee in the background, it takes me a while to clean out my car). The other two are of the shifter and the new poses it can do because I broke it.

interview

so guess what?! I know, you're thinking "not another guessing game!"...so I won't make you guess. I'll just tell you because I'm too excited to think of something clever and witty to say --

I have an interview for next week!! Woohoo!! The only downside is that it's for 9am on Monday in Cedar Rapids, IA, and I live 3.5 hours away from that. But don't be sad dearest readers, I have a plan! I'm going to see if I can spend the night at a friends house who lives a half hour away from there. Then I can sleep and rest up for the big day!

Also, it's gotten sunny out, my nose has cleared (still a little googly eyed though), and I'm eating raspberries. It's turning into an ok day.

dr. liv

I'm sick. At least I think I am. Well, I'm getting there. It might be minor but I should be prepared. That's why I'm 48% sure that I'm 100% getting sick. Let me tell you my symptoms.

1. There is icky nasty build up in the back of my throat.
2. Mucus is running from my nose (it's about half and half...the other 50% of the time my nose is plugged and I can't smell or taste...which is a big bummer).
3. I don't enjoy food right now. Which is big one. I love food. I do. Now I don't. Which means something is wrong. There were 2 milk duds sitting on the table last night....I didn't eat them. Didn't even look at them (well, ok, I looked at them). Instead I had a burrito. It wasn't even that great of a burrito. It was a frozen store bought one.
4. I'm drinking tea. I don't drink tea. But last night, tea sounded like the best thing in the world...and it was. It was also the best thing in the world this morning.
5. My eyes are all googly. You know when your head feels really heavy and detached from your body and then your eyes feel puffy and goober-y and when you're having a conversation with someone and you're looking at them you feel like your staring them down with these huge big googly eyes? But you can't help it? Because you're sick? Like me?
6. I went to bed at 9:00 last night. I woke up at 8:00.

Upon self-diagnosis I think that I'll need to wait to see if symptoms persist or slowly and painfully go away. Also, I'm prescribing, to myself, that after work I go home, curl up on the floor of the living room (our couch is broken, but we have a pillow nook set up), bring a box of kleenex's and tea...maybe make my brother go get me some yummy chocolate...or make ganache, and watch Pride and Prejudice (the old 6 hour version with Colin Firth...yea...).

I'm am pleased with my diagnosis and prescription. I would definitely recommend myself as a doctor to anyone.

guess

Guess what?! Guess what?! Guess! Seriously. Guess. Just go for it. Say something crazy like, "You're going to the moon Liv!" (no, I'm not...guess again!) Really. Just one more time. Because you're never going to guess it. Really, because I haven't told you anything about it, so you're actually not going to guess what it really is. But just one more guess. Maybe this time say, "Johnny Depp came to your small and insignificant town of 5,000 in the middle of Iowa because he wanted to hear you sing that elephant song you know in french (which is true, I can sing a children's song about an elephant in french)." Wrong again! Ok, ok, I'll tell you.

This past summer I did a commission for a clinic in the town of where I went to school at. It was really awesome because I was the only student they chose artwork from (we had to submit a proposal and all that jazz). The commission was for 4 pieces, each of them were a different animal playing an instrument. I created the outlines on the computer, printed them out and watercolored them, and yes, they're really cool). (here comes the good part, are you excited?) I didn't want to let these animals go to waste, because they're so darn cute!, so I thought maybe I could print out more and sell them. I talked to the owner of a local children's bookstore and, after seeing my work, said she would love to let me sell these in her shop!! Woo!! So now, I have to make more! Don't worry, I'll post pictures soon!

Also, this morning I'm going sans coffee. Not because I want to (who would do that?) but because I forgot to make some and I was running late...again. So I'm drinking water. Which is kind of a bore. But at least I'm hydrating...instead of...non-hydrating.

Optimism

I'm being optimistic today. It is an optimistic day (despite the rain and gloom). So instead of focusing on the fact that I don't have a job, we're all going to look at my options. Yesterday was kind of a downer. Things I couldn't do (even though I could do anything). So I've created a list (I've had to shorten it considerably) of the jobs I would be totally awesome at.


1. Writer of fortune cookies - "tomorrow you will see a squirrel that will be able to talk russian and you will videotape this animal and make millions" or "try to find inspiration in the little things. Like miniature doll houses, ponies, or fire ants."


2. Crayola Color namer - I call this one "puke green" and this one "sparkly aunt jemima brown" and this one "orange you glad I didn't say banana" (which would work for either orange or yellow).

3. Weather woman - "Today it will rain. Tomorrow it may not. After that it might get sunny, but there is a chance it will still be cloudy." - It's like playing mama nature!

4. Mascot - I would be an awesome mascot, let me tell you why. First I would make everyone in the bleachers do the wave. Then I would walk around with my hand to my ear and make everyone cheer. Then I would try and do cheers with the cheerleaders (that would be my favorite part) and end in the splits (which I can't do...at all really, but because I would be the mascot everybody would still love me!).

5. Chocolate tester - I love chocolate. Which I think is the only requirement for this job. The only downsides I can think is I'd become a fat diabetic with no teeth.

The world is full of possibilities!

Limitations

Because I haven't found an incredibly awesome graphic design job yet, I've been looking into other professions. I know what you're thinking 'Liv, you are so incredibly awesome you could do anything you ever wanted, including being a super villian that wears a green checkered cape with pointy purple shoes and rides a segway around town creating non-harmful mischief'. And you're right, dear reader, I could be anything I wanted to. But, I do have my limitations, and I've created a list of 5 jobs I couldn't do.

1. Dentist - Think about the children and the leftover hunks of pizza or cheerios or playdough in their teeth...sorry....almost gagged.

2. Basically anything in the medical field. I have a weak stomach and an active gag reflex.

3. Fire Fighter - I sweat like a man in any kind of heat

4. Bearded lady at the circus - I just can't grow facial hair. Simple as that.

5. Garbage collector - like I said, gag reflex.

Anybody else have jobs they couldn't do?

It's all greek to me.

It's not that I don't like cars, it's just I'm fairly neutral about the subject...and the fact that I don't understand them at all. Lately though, my car has been making noises. I hate taking my car in to get it fixed, I'm always paranoid they're either going to say, "I'm really sorry to tell you this, but that little noise you were hearing was actually the sparktugger from the extralatory side of the engine...and we did all we could, but she can't be fixed. You're going to have to let her go." or they're going to say "yea, that huge ga-lunk you were hearing whenever you turned your steering wheel to the left about 40 degrees and ran over two potholes in a row means that there's a two-by-two inch metal prong that needs to be fixed. But because of the location and time it takes to get to it, including the fact that we need to take your whole car apart and need about 8 men to help, it's going to cost you about $5,995.32"

While I realize these two scenarios may be a little far fetched, my paranoid brain comes up with them. Ok, so here are the noises my car is making:

1. Thwack - This noise happens mainly when I'm turning. For example, if I'm pulling into my driveway (which is a slight uphill, then a plateau), as soon as the wheel is cranked I hear "THWACK". Now, I've taken it in before and they've told me that this is a piece of plastic that is loose. So they said they fixed that piece of plastic. Three different car people/mechanics/liars who try to take your money because you know nothing about a car have fixed this "piece of plastic".

2. Gachunga (it took me a while to figure out how to write that one out...it's a little low repeating sound) - This just happened fairly recently...after they had fixed the 'piece of plastic'. It sounds like something is loose, and just rattling around.

3. Rumba-rumba - This is somewhat ongoing and a little hard to hear at times (my trunk is a little squeaky...that's another issue though). It happens when I'm going slow and I go over a bump, it kind of goes RUMBA, RUMBA, RUMBA.

Now just imagine me trying to explain all of these noises, with hand actions mind you, to the mechanic.

Maybe I should just get a bicycle.

Delightfully Tacky Giveaway

Do you want this necklace? (I know you totally do), go to Delightfully Tacky and check it out! She's reached 100 followers and is giving this away! Yay free stuff!

For the love of ganache

Because I have don't have a full time job...and a lot of free time, I've attempted to fill that void with multiple things, like: tv, workouts, knitting, making up new dance moves, shopping, yoga, making up an alter-ego, etc. (I think have have ADD)...and the only thing that has stuck is baking. Well, it started out as baking cupcakes...now I just make the frosting. So it's not really baking...at all, really.

On that note, I would like to introduce you to Ganache.

Ga-nache

noun

A whipped filling of of chocolate and cream, used in deserts such

as cakes and truffles.

It's amazing. I first found it in a cupcake book and then looked for different recipes around the internet and have tried out each one of them...and eaten them all (with the help of my mom....it's a great snack for scrabble at 10pm).

So I give you what I have found to be the best recipe, and for those of you who need visual communication and can't follow written directions (myself included) I have included pictures!

You will need:

Stainless steel bowl

Whisk

7 oz. semi-sweet baking squares.

1/4 cup milk chocolate chips

1 cup heavy whipping cream

Yes, it is just chocolate and cream, but it's not as sweet as you would think it would be (although I like putting in just a little bit of milk chocolate so that it's not all semi-sweet). It's perfect. There are recipes that call for butter, but it really doesn't do anything for it.

1. Chop up the baking squares...like so

2. Put all chocolate (chopped and chips) in the stainless steel bowl

3. Bring the cream to a boil (stirring with the whisk).

4. Once the cream has come to a boil pour it over the chocolate.... And whisk away!

4. Keep stirring until there's no chunkies, and it looks like this. Yum.

Now you have a couple of options.

1. You can leave it like this. If you leave it like this you can let it set up in the fridge (it gets almost a fudge-y texture to it)...it's hard to use as frosting when it's like this.

2. You can not leave it like this. If you want to use if for frosting...let it set up in the fridge, then...follow these awesome pictures!

Put the ganache in a mixing bowl of some sort....and whip it!

And then you'll get this!! Yay! If you refrigerate it after this point it gets a little crusty and not so good.

Enjoy the Ganache...I hope you love it as much as I do.

Owls Giveaway

The Owls Are Not What They Seem has a fabulous giveaway, so go and check it out! And if you're feeling really adventurous and uber-crafty they even have a pattern for it.

Loathing

I resisted the urge to post 12 times in the past 24 hours. I got really excited when the sun came out this morning...that was a good moment.

I just got back from the gym. Yes, I said that to make you jealous and think I'm really really buff. The whole 4 hours I was working out (just kidding..it wasn't four hours...it was 9) I was listening to music from Wicked. Last night I saw it with my mom in Des Moines. Originally I saw it a few years ago in New York and this time it was just as fabulous! I loved it (and I'm thinking about creating my own...it will be a small production...probably free...and may be just a one woman show as I don't think anybody else would want to be attached to it). My favorite song from Wicked is Loathing...lucky for you I've attached a video so you don't have to go searching for it yourself.



I leave you with a photo of one of my cats: Colonel Sanders (yes, she is a girl and yes, she was named by two 18-year-old boys)

Hello.

Dear future readership,

With this blog, I promise to entertain, inform, write frequently, make you laugh, make you cry (tears of joy), and most of all...well, it's really for my benefit because I need someone to talk to other than my mom. (she just made swedish pancakes...and they were awesome).

Before we get into this relationship, you may want to know a few things about me.
1. I recently graduated (with a degree Graphic Design)
2. I'm working part-time...
a. I need a full time job. Preferably in my field. Something totally awesome. Sadly, all of the totally awesome graphic design
jobs are taken.
3. I'm living at home with my mom and brother. I don't really want to talk about that right now.

p.s. If you're wondering what a crunchbird is, I will tell that story soon enough...you just have to keep coming back to my blog to find out.